As a practicing psychologist and keen observer of societal evolution, I find it remarkable how gender dynamics have reached an unprecedented level of complexity in our time. While navigating gender-related discussions requires careful consideration today, I feel compelled to share insights drawn from my unique experience in environments dominated by both men and women throughout different phases of my life.
My early years, like many male peers, were deeply rooted in spaces defined by conventional masculine norms. I participated extensively in athletics, including being part of my high school’s elite varsity football squad, and later pursued collegiate baseball with an athletic scholarship. Beyond sports, I was immersed in male social circles and spent my adolescence working at a local lumber yard.
These male-centric environments of my formative years emphasized physical prowess, demanded resilience, and facilitated my integration into the traditional masculine community.
However, my life’s latter chapter has been predominantly shaped by female-led environments. Pursuing my career in psychology during the late 1990s meant navigating spaces where women constituted the vast majority of both colleagues and mentors. I stood alone as the sole male student in my doctoral program, and throughout my professional journey, male representation has consistently remained minimal.
Currently, as a practicing psychologist, I maintain a private practice where women form the majority of my client base (many identifying with either second-wave or fourth-wave feminist movements), and I regularly conduct women’s therapy groups. Furthermore, my role as a coach for my daughter and her peers across various sports has provided invaluable education about the perspectives and priorities of emerging female leaders. Unlike the male-dominated groups of my earlier years, success in these female-majority environments hinges primarily on emotional intelligence and effective interpersonal communication.
Through my extensive experience in both traditionally masculine and feminine spheres, I’ve observed that each environment operates with its distinct set of rules, expectations, and norms (RENs). In a related article, The Unwritten Rules of Boyhood and Girlhood, I delved into these contrasting RENs within masculine and feminine settings, examining how they shape the developmental journey from boys and girls into men and women.
I’ve noticed that when these environmental RENs are clear and well-defined, individuals typically conform regardless of their personal views. For example, when women enter traditionally male-dominated spaces like law enforcement, or when men join predominantly female environments like yoga communities, they generally adopt an adaptable mindset, embracing the established RENs without resistance.
However, challenges emerge in environments where the dominance of masculine or feminine RENs remains ambiguous. In these spaces – educational institutions, corporate offices, and mixed social settings – both men and women tend to impose their familiar RENs onto the environment, often resulting in friction and mutual dissatisfaction. This tension frequently manifests through gender-specific narratives, with comments like “Steve exemplifies the entitled male mindset that’s holding us back,” or “Women like Beth are contributing to the softening of American society.”
These gender-specific narratives then become amplified through various media channels, eventually erupting into controversial disputes like the Gamergate phenomenon.
But what led us to this complex intersection of gender dynamics and societal expectations?
Throughout human history, survival activities predominantly required physical prowess and demanding labor. Activities such as hunting, agricultural work, mining operations, ship construction, fishing expeditions, and various construction trades were primarily assigned to men due to their physiological advantages in body size and muscular strength. According to research from the US Department of Health and Human Services, male bodies are typically 15% taller and 20% heavier than female bodies (Ogden et al., 2004). Scientific studies have also demonstrated that men possess greater overall muscle mass compared to women (Jansen et al., 2000), providing them with significant advantages in tasks requiring physical strength (Miller et al., 1993; Frontera et al., 1991; Leyk et al., 2007). This biological reality meant that during historical periods when survival predominantly depended on physical capability, men naturally assumed these responsibilities due to their enhanced physical attributes.
This physical superiority has presented both advantages and challenges for men throughout history. While it granted men privileged access to positions of authority within social hierarchies, confining women to what feminist sociologist Nancy Chodorow terms “the reproduction of mothering,” it simultaneously burdened men with society’s most physically demanding, stressful, and hazardous occupations. This physical advantage also meant men were disproportionately conscripted into warfare, facing death and violence in countless historical conflicts. These factors, among others, have contributed to men’s global life expectancy being approximately four years shorter than women’s (United Nations, 2015).
However, the landscape began shifting dramatically with the advent of the Technological Revolution in the 19th and 20th centuries. Building upon the foundational achievements of the Industrial Revolution, particularly in metallurgy and material science, this technological transformation fundamentally altered production methods, with sophisticated machinery gradually replacing human labor in many physically demanding and dangerous tasks.
Moreover, as mechanical innovations reduced the necessity for raw physical strength in many occupations, these positions became increasingly accessible to women and younger workers, who could now perform these tasks with similar efficiency to their male counterparts.
As a consequence of these technological advancements (and the significant loss of male workers during both world wars), the proportion of women in the labor force has consistently increased over the last 120 years. Furthermore, the nature of workplace responsibilities has undergone a remarkable transformation, with an increasing number of positions demanding intellectual capabilities rather than physical strength—an area where women have demonstrated themselves to be at least as competent as their male counterparts. In this context, women now exceed men in enrollment at American colleges (NBER, 2020), medical schools (Glicksman, 2017), and law schools (Pisarcik, 2019) for the first time in recorded history.
During the early 1900s, men dominated virtually all professional environments, and consequently, the majority of public workplaces and social settings operated under the implicit RENs of traditional masculinity. However, as women have progressively entered the workforce in greater numbers, an increasingly prominent collective voice of women has voiced dissatisfaction with these traditionally masculine RENs in their workplaces, advocating for the incorporation of traditional feminine RENs.
We currently stand at a pivotal moment in history, where women constitute nearly half of the total workforce and in numerous professions, women make up as much as 98% of workers. Considering this unprecedented level of female workforce participation, it’s understandable why there exists substantial debate regarding whose RENs should govern these environments. While men in these settings maintain that their industries flourished for generations under traditional masculine RENs and should therefore continue, women, who now comprise the vast majority in certain sectors, feel equally justified in demanding a shift toward RENs that better accommodate their needs and align with their socialized norms.
This struggle between traditionally masculine and feminine RENs has intensified throughout the last hundred years, emerging as the central conflict in contemporary cultural discourse and permeating every aspect of our society and our politics.
The historic 2016 presidential race, which pitted a female candidate against a male opponent for the first time, is widely regarded as the most divisive election in American history. The victor, Donald Trump, appeared to interpret his win as an endorsement to lead with pronounced hypermasculinity. However, rather than reverting America to an era dominated by traditionally masculine RENs in public spheres, his presidency has paradoxically galvanized women’s advocacy groups and catalyzed the #MeToo movement to push more forcefully in the contrary direction. Consequently, the gender-based power struggle that emerged with the Technological Revolution shows no signs of resolution. These contentious battles of the sexes are destined to persist and intensify unless society can collectively embrace a new paradigm of RENs that harmoniously integrates the valuable aspects of both traditional masculinity and femininity.
